The Day My Mom Added Me to Facebook
It’s always a predicament when a person that you haven’t spoken with in years, or that you met once through a mutual friend, or that you work with adds you to Facebook. The initial reaction may be to decline the friend request, but guilt takes over and you slide the mouse to ‘accept’ instead. You know that you will probably never actually message each other and if you do, the chain messages will end shortly after you both agree to keep in touch.
Several weeks ago, I came across a particular request that really put me in a pickle: my mom. As I look at her cute smiling profile pic, my hand fails to move the mouse in one direction over the other. Of course I cannot deny my mother’s friendship, but at the same time it is kind of a weary feeling to allow your mother the capabilities of Big Brother. After weighing the pros and cons, I decide that I simply cannot decline my mom’s request.
Days later I regret my decision. I get a phone call from my mom asking about my Barbie-themed birthday party. “It was fun,” I say.
“What kind of fun?” she questions.
I ponder for a moment about what she could possibly have found out about my party that. She already knew the theme, but she did not see my outfit. Perhaps she was a bit shocked by my tight and bright tube dress. She also brings up my best friends leotard thong costume. Although my mother was laughing at our ridiculous outfits and pointing out how well we all dressed to the theme, I still felt strange to know that my mom was able to see the going-ons of a university party. This was the first of many phone calls my mom has made inquiring about various facebook photo albums and news feed gossip.
This experience made me realize a few things about the relationship between technology and family. One: It is a hard choice to make when a family member adds you to Facebook. Either way, you are faced with a moral conundrum. Fortunately for me, I have a close relationship with my mom and I don’t feel a need to hide anything from her. Two: It’s even more mind boggling that I am okay with being creeped by someone I haven’t seen since grade five, but I am hesitant to allow a close family member to do so. Three: There are some things that a mother just shouldn’t want to know about her daughter, and vice versa (which is also why I started the asterisks labeling scheme on my blog). By accepting a mom or a daughter, you are putting yourself at risk of discovering some disturbing information. So mothers and daughters alike, use your discretion the next time you hit request.
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